Do empaths fall easier for abusive people?

After very very hard and painful work of trying to teach positive communication skills, which always gets Good results. Also to make sure your tone of voice is not Harsh. He had zero understanding you can say the exact thing in different tones of voice and always are met with bad reactions right back at you or say the exact same thing in a very kind voice and get Good results in return. Also another impossible thing to teach Abusers. So because they love challenges or contests. Especially pissing contests. The challenge was taken then the teachings implemented got easier and easier. Like riding a bike and you get 2 1/2 years of kind, no abusive language or rotten tones of voice and YOU HAVE PROVEN that you Never Ever start anything, even the smallest of arguments. Is he perfect at doing this, No!! He still has a few bad habits. Nothing to cause an extreme explosion of fights that also would get physical. Then one day he starts changing back. So you say that was messed up do you really want things to go back to the horrible way they were?? Him; No then him in a few more weeks of small slip ups if you want to call them that. Me; Im Warning you if you keep doing this. Its going to get very Ugly again!! A few more weeks he is back to FULL BLOWN NARCISSIST ABUSER!! Only this time he has even bigger guns😩 WHY WHY What happened or Who triggered this despicable behavior to come back full force??? I don’t know Why and no one… WTF then how do you expect me not to have any Bad Reactions to this even worse Abuse that included Spitting in my face. Im like Why why would you do that. I was just coming up the stairs who always hears and is sick of his abuse to me and the hysterical crying he reduces me to. Gas lighting, i didnt open the door and with a very red angry face. Screaming a bunch of unintangible words. Then out of no where i say WHAT??? Then here comes his Spit not only hitting me in the right eye but partly going into my mouth!!!! Thought you were coming up to attack me since i got the last knife in your back. No way im letting you even try to take that some how in their minds is a Victory. Me that is the sickest things people only do to others that they despise!!! Like spitting in the face of a cop or spitting at a person who just got off in court as not guilty for raping you, killing a relative or any other not enough tangible evidence that they did it without a Doubt.

Abusers are always the first to start conflict and enjoy the effects and power it has over an Empathic. Empathics dont have it in them to start anything with anyone they are never the aggressor. But an Empathic can have very bad Reactions to the abuser. If the abuser pushes them Way to much and to hard with is usually their goal. They are always the Number one Domino that causes the bad chain of events that knock down so many other whether intentional or not. Empaths are like bubbling volcanos. At least i am, you hurt me verbally or emotionally. I get upset by this i mean hurt not angry. If the abuser pushes you again even further which they pretty much always do. Because they like that power they have over you. For me it is always the 3rd very hard Blow. That makes this volcano EXPLODE!! Then the abuser uses that against you and says look at you your the psycho. Which is of course their way to reverse their despicable agains on you. I say every-time with many examples. That if you start a fire even if you dont think it should upset us. If it does just apologize and say I didn’t mean for that to hurt you. Its as easy as that, but for abusers “Whats the fun in that” they love having that power over you. So instead of putting out that small fire. They pour gasoline on it. The fire is obviously going to get Bigger. If they still choose not to Stop the fire and add more gasoline instead. The fire gets so Big it burns them. Then they are shocked when they get burned. By the bad reaction you just caused to happen by choosing Not to put it out. Its simple as that!! But an abuser will use this against you. Look at you Fire your out of Control. Well, Duh!! You made the choice not to Stop it, for me its by the 3rd time. I dont know why but by the 3rd time they have chosen to do nothing but make it worse. I have 3 bad reactions that end up happening usually in the same order everytime. First, I text bomb the shit out of them asking how and why they do this… They respond with nothing but one or two stupid words. Never respond with a direct answer to the question at all. So they get more and more angry texts. Which they say something vague which as nothing to do with Anything your saying. Then your accused of texting a book or novel. Then they taunt you by saying im deleting this shit. Second bad reaction, is the huge overwhelming need to smash something usually something of there’s. Which is usually a non controllable direct reaction of their none stop firing of very painful words of abusive things and Worst they Will Never let you get one word in. They dont let you talk at all. They just keep blasting you with lies, insults and vulgar words. Even when your on your knees begging them to stop because their words are crushing the life out of you. Still they dont stop so Bad Reaction number 3. Is reeling in pain that has gutted you to your core. Thats why they say emotional abuse is way worse than physical. Once they have you completely down crying hysterically even screaming till your voice becomes Horse and you rather be Dead then feel this deepest level of Empathetics pain. Crying your soul out they then say one more kick in the mouth. Since they go straight for your jugular everytime. Then just walk away, thats it just go watch TV or play games on their phone. Ignoring your pleas and also never ever check to make sure your not really killing yourself. Especially because thats the only thing you think could stop the unrelating Pain. Nope they have no ability to give a shit or feel bad to what they reduced you. Narcissistic Abusers have zero Empathy. They dont feel your pain at all. Even being proud of themselves for their what they think is some kind of Win… They definitely will never say their wrong even if they realize they were. They will never let you they are Wrong about Anything. They have the intense need to be Right about Everything!!

They definitely have a streak of Evil. Except they lie and deny then they play the victim. WTF your thinking if you Did not choose to abuse there would be no bad reaction ever!! I challenged him and completely showed him. If he used better words like my lovely or sweet girl. Instead of Cunt, Bitch or his fav. Fu*cking WHORE. Do not in any way say anything hurtful and mean. Use positive communications skills instead. Which they definitely cant do but, I taught him what you said was this 🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬 Instead try saying please can you help me with this or that. Also uses abusive communication to the kids. HIM; Look at this Fu*king mess you left on the table. ME; try saying if your done with your drinks please rinse out your cup and put in the sink… Thank you

Hi everybody! I have been looking at posts on narcs and narc abuse on here and if has really helped me out a lot. I am currently struggling with my situation and need some advice/support. I met a narc last year, everything seemed to good to be true. Love bombing, always texting calling and taking me on dates. Everything changed when someone warned me about him out in public in front of him and who he is. This caused a conflict with us and the love bombing seized. he would tell me that everything is okay and i can come and talk. He would set a time limit on me and kick me out after that. he would then text me like everything was fine and we hung out again and after that he completely ghosted me for one week. He came back and texted me a week later laughing about the ghosting and acting like nothing had happened. he continued to text me ( not like in the beginning) make plans with me, then on the day of the plans he would just ghost me. One day he would act interested the next silence. i contacted him a month later and he acted like nothing happened. He was on a vacation and sent me a picture of another woman ( someone he allegedly met on the trip) to strike a reaction but i never gave him one. After the trip he came to my place and was extremely rude, accusing me of going on dates with a bunch of men. The next day he accused me of being an alcoholic and that he wanted nothing to do with me but said well maybe we can be "friends" then ghosted me i assumed at this point it was over and i would never hear from him again. He contacted me on the holiday a month later acting like everything was great. We ended up hanging out a month or so later and when we hung out it went well, i thought things were going in the right direction. after we hung out.. silence. I would try to text him and if he replied it would be very short then he just stopped replying. He ghosted me for almost three months. I thought he was done this time and of course he popped up again like nothing happened. At this point i was getting sick of if so i questioned him as to why he dissapeared and always does this. Of course he had some sob story about a injury and family member dying of cancer. I felt pity for him and he gave me an apology.. so i took him back stupidly. things seemed to be going smooth for a couple months, of course until his family member died and his injury got better he never contacted me and was distant. Menawhile, i was there for him during the difficult time for him. He lied to me about the funeral and never wanted to chat. I was chasing him and he would always claim nothing was wrong but when i said i thought he used me when he was down he could not handle it and would always tell me he didnt care and to go away. I would get so upset i would try texting him to work it out he would barelt respond and if he did he would not be nice about it. we did hang out a couple times after that, he would ignore me after. One day i was like hey i think you are seeing someone else, and i was like well ixam seeing someone so no problem if you are he said " buy bye good luck with your new guy stop contacting me" i was devastated and tried to get into contact with him for weeks then i just gave up and accepted it was over. He ended up contacting me a month later acting like everything was fine. He wanted to go out and have drinks i told him i would. He and i both seemed to have a great time. He ends up ignoring me again. I kept texting him trying to figure out what was wrong. He kept saying everything was fine and i said ok can we hang out again? He said maybe i was like why? He just kept saying maybe … our last conversation we had… i said what is wrong ? He said nothing is wrong everything is fine. I asked him why he keeps saying maybe. He said " maybe but i dont want to see you right now" i said why? He saix " im just not feeling it, if i wanted to date i would" i said why did you contact me less then a week ago wanting to go out? He said i didnt.. even though he did. So i said should i just move on or what? He said whatever you want to do. So i said that he was really confusing me and asked him if he had anything more to say before i move on? My messages were turning green so i panicked he blocked me and reacted irrationally. I said " omg did you block me? My messages are not going through. Even texted him on my work phone asking what was up. And called him twice ( please dont judge me i know it is pathetic i never was this type of girl before him) so he replied and said " Ok I'll block you now" then immedietly blocked me. He has never blocked me before since I have met him he will just ghost. Is this ths final discard aka " grand finale? Did i just push him too far? this has upset me so much its hard to even function.

Then knowing he fu*ked up BIG TIME. I was coming up to tell my son to pls get me some snowballs when you go to the Convenience store. Realizing what he did and the WRONG ASSUMPTION he always makes!!! Tried to say it was an accident, OMG seriously how do you accidentally spit even doing the CA-TOO sound with Spit hitting the person at the bottom of the stairs direct Bullseye??? HIM; I was brushing my teeth OMG seriously when do you brush your teeth after causing a huge fight?? Thats when i opened the door and still had alot of spit in my mouth and tried to hear what you were screaming?? So it just happened to fly out of my mouth about 4 or 5 feet, yes because spit from brushing teeth flys instead of just drools out of your mouth. OMG FU*KING LIAR AND VERY BAD LIE!!! But i wasn’t screaming at you and coming up the stairs. In fact you scared me when you flung open the door so hard and started screaming a bunch of stuff I couldn’t understand so i said, WHAT??? That when you Definitely Spit at me on total purpose!! Pathetic Liar!!! So to me after all of the serious abuse and severe beat downs or his fav pressing his forearm so hard against your throat. Cutting off your breathing completely. While making your teeth clench down causing either you biting your tongue very badly or inside of your bottom lip or both with bleeding then severe purple bruising. As you struggle to get him to stop even if you have to grab his Shirt and rip it as hard as you can. Because doing anything to any of his things is a big No No then its, LOOK WHAT YOU DID TO MY SHIRT. I couldn’t breathe and was scared you weren’t going to STOP but no yeah your ripped shirt is worse then my Bloody Mouth i say WTF get the Hell away from me and dont come back. I take him back because his Love-Bombing stage is So Good and much needed cuz i have a type of Stock Holm Syndrome now and unfortunately the Evil Narcissistic abuser is somehow the only one who were not abusing comfort me relieves any anxiety I might be having and cuddling me so good and cozy. I built up the need for that from him in such a big way???😭 Its like sleeping with the Enemy!! FU*K YOU DEEP EMPATHY!! A CURSE IN EVERY WAY!!! But in my mind the Spitting in my face was way worse since it is something only done to someone you Despise so Much😭